I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
