I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
