oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
