Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
