i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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