it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Randomize
