Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
