I must be too annoying 4 u.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
