remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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