i think my mom watched the whole time
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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