This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
