You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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