Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
