I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize