Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
