After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize