I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
