super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
no you cant smoke seaweed
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
