i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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