so explain again why im purple
no
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
