Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
