dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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