covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize