ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
