Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I queefed so loud it echoed.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
