pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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