I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
