My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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