He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
