But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
