There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
