Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
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