I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
