I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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