last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
