dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
