Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
