Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
