the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
