he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
