I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
