1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
