you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Randomize
