I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
