my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
