i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
