make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize