Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
