I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
