Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
